THE GABBLER

Our politic coverage.

D.C. Dissonance

Wednesday, January 30th, 2013

Police Report Disturbing Emergence of New Politically-Charged 'Gang of Eight'

  On Monday, District of Columbia police reported the emergence of a new local gang, known only on the streets as “The Gang of Eight.” While the organization’s level of danger is yet to be determined, The Gang of Eight has wasted no time in making their presence known not only to their local community

Monday, January 7th, 2013

Why You Don't Mess with Jersey

The following was sent to the personal email account of Speaker of the House John Boehner from Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey on the night of January 1st, 2013. It deals with the Sandy Relief Bill...

Sunday, January 6th, 2013

Too Big to Jail

Wednesday, January 2nd, 2013

Oh, I'm Just a Fiscal Bill

In the hopes that a catchy tune may help the House of Representatives pass the new fiscal deal more quickly, Schoolhouse Rock!, best known for its animated musical educational films, has released a spinoff of the hit...

Monday, December 31st, 2012

A New Year, a New President

The following list was found on the desk of the Oval Office and appears to be President Obama’s personal New Year’s Resolutions. Several relate to his family and personal life, but many are related to his duties...

Friday, December 28th, 2012

Fiscal Metaphors

Wednesday, December 19th, 2012

Amended Second Amendment

Wednesday, December 19th, 2012

NRA Attempts to Release Statement, Resulting Only in Awkward Pauses, Vomit

  In the wake of the horrific tragedy of the school shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School last Friday, the National Rifle Association (NRA) was scheduled to finally release a statement on Tuesday. Unfortunately, at the press...

Monday, December 17th, 2012

A Letter to America in Response to the Sandy Hook Shootings

Dear America, We get it, you know. We know that things are rough, what with the global economy and the fiscal cliff and partisanship and all those big, important words and numbers that never quite add up....

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