THE GABBLER

October 31st, 2012
The Romney Family Hurricane Preparedness List

 

As Hurricane Sandy hit the East Coast on Monday, and President Obama repeatedly announced his break from campaigning to track the storm’s damages, Republican presidential hopeful Mitt Romney also worked tirelessly to raise money for hurricane victims.

“I appreciate your generosity. It’s part of the American spirit, the American way, to give to people that are in need,” Romney said to the crowd at a fundraising event in Dayton, Ohio.

Meanwhile, his wife, Ann Romney, also made an effort to discuss hurricane preparedness with Americans. Mrs. Romney released the family’s own Hurricane Preparedness List to the Gabbler, in the hopes that all Americans potentially facing the storm can use the list as a model for their own preparedness lists, and will be sufficiently prepared for anything.

“We keep this pinned to the fridge, no matter what. It’s keeping track of the necessities that will keep you safe and secure in unsure times such as these,” said Romney.

The full list is below.

 

The Romney Family Hurricane Preparedness List:

-Drinking Water (approximately 1 gallon of Perrier per person, per day)

-The Book of Mormon, 25 copies

-Black Capelin Caviar, 30 cans

-Imported Poached Albacore Tuna in Olive Oil, 45 cans

-Muir Glen Organic Fire Roasted Tomatoes, 50 cans

-Macallan 50-Year (for guests only), 10 bottles

-Boudin French Bread packed in moisture-proof plastic, 50 baguettes

-L’Artisan Parisian Macaroons, 40 boxes

-Rosemary Parmesan Crips, 45 boxes

-36-Month Aged Roomano Pradera gouda, 6 wheels

-Moro Blood Orange Juice, 50 bottles

-Bella Viva Organic Dried Fruit and Nuts, 45 packages

-Cash, lots of it

-Important Tax Documentation, 2012 only

-Passports, 25

-Posters of Brigham Young, 8

-Framed Harvard University Diploma, 1

-Temple Undergarments, 60 pairs

-Gas lanterns, 10

-Non-drip candles, 45

-Valium, 10 bottles

-Satellite Cell Phones, 10

-Cashmere Wool Blankets, 20

-Cle de Peau Beaute Intensive Face and Body Cream, 15 bottles

-Hairspray, 10 cans

-Sesame Street DVDs, 10 seasons

-Solar-Powered iPads (Don’t tell Obama!), 10

-Gold, 50 bars

-Diamonds, 100 carats

-Cadillacs with Full Tanks, 2

-Children, 5

-Grandchildren, 18

-Bodyguards, 4

-Cooks, 3

-Drivers, 2

-Physicians, 1

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