THE GABBLER

December 14th, 2012
Grinchmas, Pre New Year’s Apathy, Presign

Grinchmas (grɪntmæs): A party, normally held on the Friday before Christmas, celebrating the party thrower’s intense hatred of the Christmas holidays. “What are you wearing to her Grinchmas party this year?” “Oh, it’s great. I got the cutest red, sparkly dress and ripped out all the sequins. It looks like a total mess. How anti-Christmas is that?”

Pre New Year’s Apathy (pri nu yɪərs æpəɵi): A state of total disinterest in self-improvement during the month of December, usually characterized by the excuse “I’ll take care of it after New Year’s; it’s my resolution.” I’m suffering from the worst case of Pre New Year’s Apathy this year. Today, instead of going to the gym, I hit up KFC and then Dunkin Donuts. I figured I’d just lose the weight in the new year.”

Presign: (prɪˈzaɪn) To resign from a position before actually acquiring said position. “I heard you didn’t get the promotion, man. I’m sorry.” “What? Nah, I presigned. I’m way too overqualified for this.”  Origin: Susan Rice’s decision to withdraw her name for consideration as Secretary of State. 

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