Mitt Romney


Tuesday, November 6th, 2012

Binders Full of Policy

Wednesday, October 31st, 2012

The Romney Family Hurricane Preparedness List

  As Hurricane Sandy hit the East Coast on Monday, and President Obama repeatedly announced his break from campaigning to track the storm’s damages, Republican presidential hopeful Mitt Romney also worked tirelessly to raise money for hurricane...

Wednesday, October 24th, 2012

Draft of “Apology Tour” Found in Oval Office Garbage Can

  The following advertisement was found in the recycling bin of the Oval Office early this morning. It appears that during Monday night’s debate, when Republican Presidential Candidate Mitt Romney called President Obama’s visits to the Middle...

Wednesday, October 17th, 2012

Obama And Romney Debate About Absolutely Nothing

  Just a few hours before presidential candidates took the stage in Long Island at Hofstra University for the second of three debates, President Barack Obama and his opponent, former Governor of Massachusetts Mitt Romney, agreed to...

Wednesday, October 17th, 2012

Summary of the Debate: Mitt Romney’s Policies Don’t Hold Much Weight

Monday, October 1st, 2012

As Debates Quickly Approach, Candidates Prep Intensely

  With the first presidential debate slated for Wednesday, October 3rd, President Barack Obama and his opponent, former Governor of Massachusetts Mitt Romney, have been preparing extensively. Many political analysts and Democratic party members insist that for...

Wednesday, September 19th, 2012

Forty-seven, Coca Coûteux, MRLCFA

Forty-seven (fɔrti’sɛvən pərˈsɛnt): An extremely lazy person; specifically one who buys potato chips and cigarettes with welfare checks. “But I don’t feel like doing the dishes, Mom.” “Don’t be such a forty-seven. I made dinner, you do...

Wednesday, August 29th, 2012

Donald's Canceled Trump Card

The following speech was scheduled to be given by Donald Trump at the Republican National Convention. Unfortunately, Trump’s speech was canceled as part of scheduling changes made due to the threat of Tropical Storm Isaac. In his...

Monday, August 27th, 2012

Hoping to Increase Black Support, Romney Releases New Campaign Video

  After a recent NBC and Wall Street Journal poll reported that zero percent of African Americans support Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney, a spokesman for the Romney campaign has told The Gabbler that Romney plans to...

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