This week, the Canadian Border Services Agency (CBSA) announced its plans to install high-definition listening equipmentin airports across the country.The planted cameras and microphones are designed to pick up and record traveler and even employee conversations. The initiative is part of a larger effort on the part of the Canadian government to crack down on organized crime, drug trafficking and acts of terrorism in airports.But although government officials stand behind the initiative, the folks at CBSA have admitted to “feeling real bad ah-boot bein’ so impolite.”

“ ‘Course we don’t want to spy on people,” said a CBSA representative who politely declined to give The Gabbler his name.  “Everyone should be entitled to their privacy, eh? Plus, hearing ah-boot real private stuff always makes me blush.”

As a result of this hesitancy and concern, the CBSA simultaneously announced plans for installing signs to warn and inform travelers and workers about the presence of spy equipment.  According to CBSA, sign prototypes include such slogans as “Terrorism Plots Should Cease Beyond This Point,” “Shh! (We’re Sorry, But the Americans are Making Us Spy on You” and “It’s Officially Time to Use Your Code Words for Drugs.”

In an effort to further explain the reasons behind the spying, outline exactly how the equipment works and provide as much information about its security as humanly possible, the CBSA also has plans to set up an online privacy notice and help line through its website.

“Just be careful, eh?” explained the anonymous, yet extremely friendly and pleasant CBSA source. “The last thing we want is to get anyone in trouble.”